One of my favorite subjects is dating. You can ask any of the 6th-9th grade girls who attend my bible study and they will probably tell you that every conversation turns into a dating story or dating advice. Please don’t mistake this for me being any kind of expert; that is definitely not the case here. Let’s just say I’ve made my fair share of mistakes and I’ve chosen to learn from them instead of letting them define me.
Here’s where I will start: Ladies, wait for that special man who will pursue your heart!! I firmly believe that christian dating (that sounds so horribly cheesy, doesn’t it?) should be so intentional. We shouldn’t want to waste time on any guy (as great or as average as they may be) if we don’t see a future with him. Now, please hear me out. I’m not saying that once you start dating a guy, you should break up with him because you don’t want to marry him right then. I would be silly if I said that (please forgive me for the use of the word “silly”, some of my best friends are 10 and under..)! What I’m saying is that if you can’t see the guy as a potential future spouse, do both of yourselves a favor and end it. There is no point in risking feelings growing stronger only to be crushed eventually.
I believe that marriage is so biblical and here’s why: Our relationship should be a representation of God and the Church. God’s love was not only powerful but it was sacrificial. He sent His only son to die such a painful death for our sins. That’s how much He loved us and knew He wanted to be with us! God continues to pursue us even when we try to run. Don’t you want a guy who will do the same? Who would lay his life down for you if need be, always pursuing you even after he already won your heart.
Wait for a man who will respect your purity. This is such a vital one. If I have learned one thing from my amazing mentor Ricki Lea Moore, it is what purity truly means. She has always pressed the idea that purity is so much more than just abstaining from sex before marriage. It is having a pure heart and pure mind as well. Philippians 4:8 says “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things.” God didn’t press it upon Paul’s heart to write that for no reason at all. He wants us to be pure in every way, starting with our minds.
Wait for a man who will lead you closer to Jesus. It is the man’s place to be the spiritual leader. Now, does that mean you just sit there like a bump on a log and make him do it all? Absolutely not! As women, we are supposed to encourage and pray for them. Learning from each other and making each other better followers of Christ.
Wait for a man who you can spend the rest of your life worshiping Jesus with. If you are with someone who doesn’t have the same relationship with Jesus that you do, how do you expect to grow in Christ together? 2 Corinthians 6:14 says “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” I have learned this the hard way. Dating someone who is not evenly yoked with you will leave you empty and dry. You will find yourself being brought down instead of the other way around. Missionary dating is a good thought, however, it usually doesn’t work.
I’m going to wrap this up with a sweet little quote:
“Dance with God and He will let the perfect man cut in.”
Alright. Let’s all take a minute and laugh at how undeniably corny this is!!
Okay now that we’ve gotten over that, there is some serious truth to it. We need to focus on seeking Him first. Following hard after Him, passionately pursuing a relationship with Him. And then if it’s God’s plan for a romantic relationship to be in our lives, it will happen.
Psalm 37:4 says “Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” And that gives it to us as plain as day. When we are truly taking delight in Him, He will give us what we desire. Here’s the trick: As we are truly seeking Him, His desires will become our desires. And how amazing would that be?? So. Seek Jesus first. Delight in Him. Let Him pursue you. Be patient and wait for the man that Jesus has for you.
Thanks for reading!
〉〉 Paige Elizabeth 〈〈